A Powerful Emotional Experience

The entire trip itself was an emotional rollercoaster. From the moment my husband and son dropped me off at the airport (I cried like a baby) to the final day, I was constantly challenged and inspired.

The first day of the workshop I truly understood why the course was called Stripped Down, because we started by stripping down all that BS and started building us back up. We started by sharing our fears and being vulnerable with the entire class. 

I have always been the strong one, the one who doesn't show emotions. My dad always told me it was a sign of weakness and not to show that to others. Honestly, it felt so good to be able to be open and honest and share my truth. 

The truth is, I have a fear of not being good enough. It stems from my childhood and my messed-up family, to always feel like I have to be perfect in order to get others love.

After we all cried our eyes out, we took a break for lunch and then got right into shooting!! This was what I was waiting for, the fun part, the part that I came to the workshop for, to actually take pictures and work on the methodology! 

I worked my way around the stations and then I got to Denise's station. Instantly she called me out! She instantly "Seen" me. She seen through the BS and she knew I was wearing a mask. That mask that I put on every day, that mask that I put on for everyone else. 

It was at the moment that I started crying and apologizing to the model and Denise for my emotions. Denise told me never apologize for my emotions. That it's not a sign of weakness but showing our emotions is actually strength. 

I picked up my camera, started shooting the model again, with tears running down my face and Denise holding me. 

 It was a raw and vulnerable experience that allowed me to connect with my emotions on a deeper level.